Toilet Humour!!

I don't want to stereotype but on the whole (no pun intended) women have a 'thing' about toilet seats. In Heathers defence I don't ever remember her mentioning it but lots of ladies do! The 'thing' that I'm talking about is not putting the seat down after using said toilet and, in this, us men get the blame! Well not me I can tell you! I don't want to sound to anal (trying to steer away from the puns but cant help myself) but I think the toilet looks tidier with the seat down and ladies, THE LID!

We get berated for being lazy and not putting the seat down but you, you know who you are, are too damn lazy to put the lid down!

When I came home from work yesterday the house was full of ladies visiting the invalid who still isn't back at work. I stuck my head around the door to say 'hi' and got the rip taken out of me for wearing my shorts to work in the rain! I quickly retired to our downstairs toilet, this is where we hide away our coats and shoes, and there it was! The toilet lid! One of those piss taking ladies was taking the piss! GRRRR! I needed to put the lid down to sit on the toilet to take of my shoes and in doing so dropped it. It made a loud bang! Heather must have thought I did it on purpose and shouted 'It wasn't me it was Sarah!' Sarah said sorry and sheepishly stepped into the hall to be confronted with me sat on the toilet undoing my shoes. She miss-read the situation completely and thought I was having a shit! Her face was a picture, she turned red immediately and ran away saying 'oh no!', 'oh no!'

I can't say she'll never take the piss out of me again because that's what she does, but I'm quietly confident she'll put the lid down on the toilet next time she's here!

A moral to this tale, yes there is; guys if you want your lady to put the lid down on the toilet have a crap with the door open when her friends are round!!