Sunday 9 September 2007

My First Baby!



I received a quiz from my Mother-in-law the other day and duly filled it in and returned it. I thought maybe some of you would like a go so have added to the end of this post. I left my answers in just in case you're interested.


MY FIRST BABY

Here you go mommies - a different kind of survey for a change - it's all about your first born! (Daddies can do it too)

1. Were you married at the time? No.

2. What were your reactions? Freaked.

3. How old were you? 26

4. How did you find out you were pregnant? I think it was a stork!

5. Who did you tell first? No idea!

6. Did you want to find out the sex? No, we already had the sex this was the by-product!

7. Due date? Yes there was bound to be one!

8.Did you deliver early or late? Exactly on the date! I am a postman after all!

9. Did you have morning sickness? No but for every day since!

10. What did you crave? Beer.

11. Who irritated you the most? Everybody.

12. What was your first child's sex? A fumble in the bike shed I think?

13. How many pounds did you gain throughout the pregnancy? Nothing, I spent a bloody fortune!

14. Did you have any complications during your pregnancy? Sleeping with a fat fidget?

15.Where did you give birth? At the hospital!

16. How many hours were you in labor? I only voted labour ( you missed the u) once!

17.Who drove you to the hospital? Someone should have driven me?

18.Who watched? It wasn't the Discovery Channel you know!

19.Was it natural or c-section? It all seemed very un-natural so must have been a c-section?

20.Did you take medicine to ease the pain? No! I was numb from the alcohol

21.How much did your child weigh? What? Pik and Mix at Woolworths?

22.Did your child have any complications? Crying, shitting and puking!

23.What did you name him/her? You had a him/her?

24. How old is your first born today? 17

25. Where does he/she live? In the bedroom!

26.Does he/she have children? Fuck, I hope not!

As you can see I don't really remember much about this traumatic time!!

12 comments:

Vi said...

bwahahahaha!!!!

I'd like to hear DJ's version of events! Very funny to hear a dad's side of it.

I'll think I'll have to do this one at a later date.

katy said...

LOL this is just so funny!

Chris King said...

Vi; My first baby was a product of a previous marriage but I'm sure DJ would tell you exactly the same answers!

HI; All true, you know I never lie!

DJ Kirkby said...

This post made me laugh till I cried. So funny! Yes I would agree with all your answers except for the caesarian bit. I don't understand why you can alway see the funny side of things...Have I had my sense of humour amputated? It is funny when you point it out but I need that nudge to see the funny side...

Fire Byrd said...

Is there a funny side to childbirth??? not from where I lay... more like bloody agony!!!
px

Chris King said...

DJ; There is a funny side to everything. Take the Pixie for instance; she lay down to have her babies and the funny thing is if she stood up it wouldn't have hurt at all. Well it didn't hurt me!!

Lady in red said...

no the easiest way was to lie back and let the surgeons do all the work !!!

it was the last rest I had for a long time

Anonymous said...

DJ - check your email for directions to a button.

Lady in red said...

ok DJ has suggested I read your archives so now thats april read and commented on.

jAMiE said...

Very cute...nice to get a father's view.

Chris King said...

Kahless; What are you up to??

L in R; Thanks for taking the time to read my old blogs and bothering to comment. I'd be fed up after the first one!

J; It was fun to do!

Casdok said...

Proberly just as well!!