Thursday, 27 September 2007


A couple of weeks ago I made a momentous decision (for me anyway) to look for my Father. My Mother was an only child who died when I was 11 years old. Both her parents, my grandparents, are also dead. The man who I believed to be my Father (his name is on my birth certificate) is not my Father, this was kindly pointed out to me by my sister (he is her Father by the way) out of the blue one day 15 years or so ago! You keeping up?

Anyway I wrote to my Mothers cousin a couple of weeks ago to ask her what she knew and today got a reply. Now really I was expecting her to tell me who my Father was and I would then have to decide what I was going to do next. It seems it's not as simple as that! No-one knows who he was and, at the time, didn't think it prudent to ask. Well I can hardy point any fingers here can I seeing I waited 44 bloody years to ask!

I got a lovely letter back from her with some photographs, a little family history and a promise that she would keep digging. I knew my Mother had an Aunt in Canada and apparently she may know a little more so they are writing to her to see what they can find out.

Now what I really wanted to hear was my Father was a great guy who died around the time of my birth. This is why I never knew him and why he never bothered to find me. Then it occurred to me that this could all be a lot bigger than me finding the Father I never knew. What if he had other children then I could have brother/s, sister/s and my boys uncle/s, aunt/s! How would I cope with that? I didn't really think this through very well, I could have a huge extended family out there I never knew I had.

It could be you!!


her indoors said...

good luck in your search and keep us informed, and it definately is NOT me i am not a hayley cropper!

DJ Kirkby said...

I am so proud of you for finaly comming to a decision over this. You have spent so long mulling over this and I know it has been a real challenge for you to make a choice.

Vi vi vi vooom!!!!!!!! said...

Hey, your true family? It's the one you are with.


Pixie said...

It would be lovely to have a happy ending here and I sincerly hope you do.
But what if your mother never told the man he'd made her pregnant in the first place.
Not that I want to dampen your thoughts just I know that happened to my mum.

Hazel said...

Good luck.

"It could be you!!"....uh-oh. I do know that my uncle slept around with women and had a few children by them...he was a truck driver (but from what I gather mostly in the Arab States)...mind you he already had 12 children by his wife too!!!!

Chopski said...

HI; I can cross you off my list then!

DJ; I got some new photos and if that's all it will be ok.

Vi; Wise words.

P; If that happens so be it at least I can tell myself I'd tried.

H; Thanks. He probably kept driving so the CSA couldn't catch up with him!!

Kahless said...

I hope your search is fruitful.

Good for you chopski!