Saturday 12 July 2008

Sex after seventy!


There was a report out this week that said that more people over the age of seventy were having sex more often and enjoying it more than ever before!


Apart from the last sentence containing the word 'before' too many times there is definitely something wrong with it. Does it mean more sex than when they were younger or more sex than seventy year olds a decade ago? It brings too many pictures to mind that quite frankly I could happily live without. Its bad enough there is an advert on television at the moment that shows couples kissing (mouths open and most probably tongues) starting with a young pair and moving up through ages until they are snogging next to their zimmer frame and stannah stair lift. I forget what the commercial is for as I was too traumatised and was looking for more Valium before the end.


That was just kissing but sex at seventy? Can you imagine her taking her teeth out to perform oral sex while he sprays some wd40 on his plastic hip so he can get his leg over? Nonsense! Its all a fabrication by the government because we have too many old people in this country and we can't afford to keep them any longer. A solution; tell them it's okay to have it off after they draw their pension, they do, have a coronary and pop their clogs. Job done!


Don't believe me? Ask your Nan the last time she had sex and if she tells you, which she probably won't, 1945 is the year not quarter to eight!

67 comments:

Kahless said...

Yuck!
Not a mental image I wanted!

Anonymous said...

you are just getting worried that you sex life is going to carry on till you're old and grey aren't you LOL, so at what age do you think sex should stop?!

DJ Kirkby said...

Yeah, yeah, like you are ever going to want to stop having sex! We'll be wrinkly and and saggy and still going at it in our nineties!

Lady in red said...

I was going to say poor dj if chopper is going to be giving up at an early age.

hmmm I was traumatised at the tender age of 22 when my grandad (then over 70)confided in me that he was having problems keeping it up for his new partner. then 18 months ago I thought he was going to be thrown out of his care home for being overtly sexual (at 92)but they made him sign a letter promising to behave.

Chris King said...

I think 'old' is veiwed differently depending how 'old' you are. At 18, 30 is 'old'. At 30, 50 is 'old'. 70 on the other hand is 'old' in anyones book! Will I still be having sex then? Who knows, but I expect there will be a survey done so you can check up!!

Trixie said...

Hmmmm, yep chopski, you'll be reading back on ths in thirty years time going 'WTF was I going on about????'

Sparx said...

Chops - 70 isn't that old these days! I know a few 70-year-olds who would bridle at that! I think these days one isn't considered 'old' until post 85... before that one is just 'older'! It's all relative - wait until you get there!

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