You hear phrases like: everything happens for a reason, what will be will be and for every action there is a reaction. So, if you do something are you responsible for what happens to others?
e.g. Every morning when I drive to work I get to the bottom of my road, turn right and head on over the hill. If on Monday instead of turning right I turn left and use a different route and there is a crash on the bridge. A five car pile up, the third car is where my car would have been if I'd taken my usual route. The car is crushed and the driver is dead! Is that my fault? Am I responsible for his death and the repercussions for his family or would it have happened anyway? Karma?
I'm not trying to get heavy or anything like that it's just been playing on my mind a lot lately. Is our influence on our children that important? Do they turn out the way they do because of what we instill in them or would they turn out that way anyway because, I don't know, because they would? We have two teenagers who have been brought up exactly the same but they and their outlook on life are completely different, why? Shouldn't they be both the same? It screws with my brain!
I heard somewhere someone say "We are not responsible for our kids we are responsible to them." I guess this to mean that we have a responsibility to clothe them, feed them , school them, teach them right from wrong and set them out on the right road but we are not responsible for how they interpret this and the path they take!
I never listened to my step-father and would do the opposite to whatever he said, black would be white as far as he was concerned. Looking back whatever he told me was usually right, he'd probably been there and done it, but would I have turned out the way I have if I had done everything he told me without finding things out for myself often the hard way?
Perhaps we aren't supposed to know the answers to these questions but I'm happy for any hints! By the way next week will be, "How long is a piece of string?"
12 comments:
This aspect of your personality was what I first fell in love with. You are a deep thinker, it was sexy then and it is still sexy now. You know I believe in karma but I don't know why the boys are so different, can't be our karma, must be theirs. Also why is N3S turning out to be a mini clone of N1S?
I can spend hours thinking about this sort of thing and dont come up with any answers.
Sorry!
I think there are strands and tides of energy and potentiality. I think we can consciously hitch a ride to the one that takes us where we want to be, I also think that sometimes our subconscious does that for us out of awareness. I am a great believer in positive thought, and going with the flow. Our trip on the river of time may seem difficult sometimes but without that we would not get to where we need to be. The more joy you put out there, the more joy you get back in my experience. I love all this quantum level expectation science. If you avoided the pile up, you picked up the strands coming down the 'web' to you and acted on it. Well done!
I beleive that kids are all hardwired differently from a nueroscientific perspective, and will draw different conclusions from the same set of stimuli. Its absolutely wonderful!
So thats my contribution - best delivered with a spliff in hand. Not that I would ever do such a thing oh no no no ....
I think you are right about responsibility in realtion to our children. WE have to equip them to learn for themselves, however much we want to protect them by telling them not to do something. Even vile things like drugs and drink.
WE have to have faith that our teaching will come through for them.WE just have to let them know they are loved and even if they screw up we will never stop.
I know that's a bit simplistic, but thought you wouldn't want the whole pixie essay on the subject!!!
pxx
"How long is a piece of string?"
my stock answer to #3son's questions he always asks questions I can't answer not sure if thats him being difficult or me being ignorant lol
DJ; That was nice!
K; Same as me!
QV; I asked for weed but they gave me prozak!
P; The whole essay would have been fine, I'm still no nearer figuring anything out.
L in R; My longest bit is 18 inches!
Sigh...some heavy thinking for a Monday morning...i'm just not up for it, sorry. = )
J; Sorry, heavy thinking for any day really!
I think the important thing is that we learn from our own experience to trust the judgement of those with more experience.
That made a lot more sense in my head than on the page.
I have an award for Ivana on my Lite site!
JD; Thanks for that!!
K; Very kind of you, it's loud and proud on the original post!
We learn more by doing things our own way. And don't see that accident on your normal route as your fault if you take the other route, see it as you were supposed to be here another day. There's someone you still haven't touched, someone who still needs you.
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